The Collegian
Friday, February 23, 2024

And you think the Yankees and Phillies had stars?

The day after the unlikely World Series match up between the San Francisco Giants and the Texas Rangers was confirmed, I scrolled through both teams' active line-ups. I didn't know much about the players, so I started researching. Here's what I dug up.

San Francisco Giants:

SP Madison Bumgarner - He's younger than I am.

SP Matt Cain - He pitched a great game in the National League Championship Series, but I all I could think was, "Why is Will Ferrell on the mound?"

SP Tim Lincecum - Last year he was arrested for possessing 3.3 grams of marijuana, but his ERA has never been high.

RP Brian Wilson - Finally, a pitcher that looks like a biker. He's got tattoo sleeves, and a mound celebration that looks more like the World Wrestling Entertainment's HHH than Trevor Hoffman.

3B Pablo Sandoval - The 250-pounder received the nickname "Kung Fu Panda" after he successfully leaped over the catcher on a play at the plate.

OF Cody Ross - Two months ago he was on waivers. Now's he's the NLCS Most Valuable Player. That still doesn't excuse his beard though. I wouldn't even have put that facial hair on the Willy Wooly Magnetic Face Creator when I was a kid.

Texas Rangers:

RP Neftali Feliz - Another player younger than me. Can you say "heat?" The closer's fastball has been clocked as fast as 101 mph on the radar gun.

SP Cliff Lee - He'll be a Yankee next year. His contract will have us calling him "Cha-ching" Lee.

C Bengie Molina - Molina started the season as the Giants catcher until July 1 when he was traded to Texas, so either way he'll be a World Series champion, right?

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SS Elvis Andrus - It's fitting that he sometimes wears blue shoes.

RF Nelson Cruz - Nobody wanted this guy a few years ago. Five playoff home runs later, and no pitcher wants to face him.

LF Josh Hamilton - He was the No. 1 pick in the 1999 MLB draft, and then became a No. 1 crack addict. His story in the 2008 Home Run Derby made me cry. Now he's the reigning American League Championship Series MVP. Is there a better story?

I know a lot of people on campus might have lost interest in the playoffs after the New York Yankees and Philadelphia Phillies were eliminated, but I'm begging you to keep watching. I guarantee this series will go at least six hard-fought games. If you're just too upset about your favorite team being knocked out early, consider this: The Yanks and Phils are bound to steal a player or two from these teams for next year.

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