By Fiona Carmody
October 7, 2010
Guy: "Hey, [girl's name]! How are you?" (Ye olde Richmonde tip-of-the-hat gestural question, which more than certainly does not require an answer other than...)
Girl: "Good, what about you?" (Naturally, he's --)
Guy: "Good." (Action complete.) "So, do you have a lot of work to do tonight?"
And then, in what I would have thought would be taken as an irresistibly Michael Cera-ish way, "Just because, you know ... I just wanted to know if you had any plans because ... well, me and a few people were talking about maybe hanging out for a little while."
His line here continues, but I just want to stop and note that to complete the visual of the situation, you must know that he stood in one spot and pivoted in place in order to maintain eye contact as she continuously sidled around him toward the library entranceway.
Despite her impressively rapid sideways movement, I was able to catch her eyes rolling from my seat on the library bench as he tried to find the right way to ask her to chill with him.
Guy (cont.): "Anyway, I'd love if you came and hung out, too." (Phew -- right as she got her first foot in the door.) "I mean, if you don't have too much work, or whatever."
Girl: "Uh -- now I do." (I'm not kidding.